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Understanding How To Live In Equanimity and Find Happiness

Many identify with the sensation of worry or dissatisfaction during uncertain times. Your life is planned out, and then suddenly it isn’t.  But you don’t have to feel this way. The capacity for observation—the capacity to notice what’s going on around you without becoming emotionally invested in what you see—is the source of equanimity. And you can choose this over fear.

Equanimity is the quality of having a cool head under pressure, especially when things are tough. Equanimity allows you to take a moment to halt, notice, and reflect in order to monitor your snap decisions and responses to circumstances.

It’s no secret that the last few years have evoked a variety of feelings, including uncertainty, angst, and terror. Going forward, consider this: how can you maintain your resilience when things in your life start to feel too much? How can one attain inner peace amid the commotion in the world? You can develop composure.

Equanimity, the foundation of knowledge, and the guardian of compassion enable you to remain rooted in your body and mind while opening your heart to the outside world. Rather than responding to what you observe with animosity or fear, you can view the wider picture with tolerance and understanding.

Equanimity arises when we accept the way things are. ~ Jack Kornfield

What Equanimity Isn’t

Indifference is a close opponent of equanimity. Even while it could be easy to walk away from a challenging circumstance and convince yourself that nothing matters because life moves on, you won’t feel the same groundedness and engagement that comes with maintaining your composure or balance through equanimity.

Fear is the root of indifference; running away from uncertain circumstances and energy can only cause you to give up on yourself or someone you care about. You stifle your personal development when you let fear stand in the way of moving forward. To avoid feeling bad, you steer clear of new encounters.

Avoiding situations that force you to step outside of your comfort zone because you’re afraid affects your emotional development. You’re passing up the chance to develop powerful emotional abilities like self-awareness, resilience, self-soothing, and emotional intelligence.

Psychologist Carl Jung said that the greatest personal growth comes from doing what you are most afraid of. When fear keeps you from leading the life you want, it becomes a problem.  However, you may face your concerns head-on and show courage.

Equanimity is a balanced engagement with all facets of life, not a retreat, insensitivity, or apathy. Faced with chaos, it is standing firm. When you are calm, you don’t run away from the things in life you don’t enjoy or hold on to the things you do. The calm mind accepts reality as it is, refraining from judgment and taking action.

Equanimity is the hallmark of spirituality. It is neither chasing nor avoiding but just being in the middle. ~ Amit Ray

The Buddhist Middle Ground

One of the most profound feelings in Buddhist practice, equanimity, serves as both the foundation for enlightenment and liberation and the guardian of compassion and love. While mature equanimity results in a radiance and warmth of being, some people mistake it for dry neutrality or cool aloofness. A tranquil mind is “abundant, exalted, immeasurable, without hostility and without ill-will,” according to the Buddha.

The Buddha’s remedy is the Middle Way. It’s a route that stays away from the extremes of indulgence and aversion. A place beyond duality, a balancing of opposites. It’s receptive to the entirety of experience and accepts paradoxes and contradictions.

The benefit of distancing oneself from unpleasant thoughts and sensations is apparent.

It was difficult to apply the technique to the pleasurable. I was resistant, particularly because I had a history of depression and because meditation was reintroducing me to feelings of happiness that I hadn’t experienced in a while. I wanted to enjoy every enjoyable event possible, right?

The problem is that completeness requires the wholeness of serenity. Attachment brought duality and the notion that there must be an opposite—to the pleasant.

Equanimity does not diminish joy in life. It’s the other way around. Because attachment to the pleasant stems from a place of fear—the fear of loss—it lessens happiness. When happiness coexists with a hint of worry, your heart isn’t completely open.

What is patience but an equanimity that enables you to rise superior to the trials of life? ~ William Osle

Developing Mindful Qualities

Cultivating the mental traits that facilitate equanimity is one way to achieve it.

Live honestly. You feel confidence in your words and deeds when you live a life of virtue or integrity. This leads to the calmness of innocence.

Believe in something greater. Any type of faith can bring about serenity, but wisdom-based faith has greater power.  For example, you are more likely to face difficulties in your spiritual practice with composure if you have faith in your capacity to practice it.

You can develop mental strength, balance, and stability in the same way that you can develop physical strength, balance, and stability in a gym. This is accomplished by engaging in activities that foster serenity, focus, and mindfulness. You are less likely to be tossed around by the winds of this world when your mind is at ease.

In Buddhism, cultivating and improving your well-being is suitable and beneficial. It’s far too simple to ignore the bounty of well-being that surrounds us daily. Even just pausing to savor a cup of tea or watch the sunset can help cultivate mindfulness.

A profound understanding of reality, as it exists, is called insight. The deepest insights reveal things change so swiftly that there is nothing to hold on to. Eventually, the mind gives up trying to hold on to things. To let go is to become balanced.

Being wise can help us distinguish between individuals and their behaviors. You can maintain equilibrium in your relationship with the person even if you disagree with their conduct. Alternatively, you could realize that impersonal circumstances drive your own thoughts and desires. You will be more at peace when they arise if you wisely don’t take them personally.

When you start to let go of your reactive inclinations, freedom will follow. Observing situations where you were reactive in the past but are no longer so will give you an idea of what this entails.  The goal of practicing Buddhism is to increase the variety of life situations in which one is free.

A compassionate heart still feels anger, greed, jealousy, and other such emotions. But it accepts them for what they are with equanimity, and cultivates the strength of mind to let them arise and pass without identifying with or acting upon them. ~ Stephen Batchelor

Developing Equanimity

The Buddha taught that skillful attention—that is, being constantly aware of the present moment, without interruption, with the purpose of cultivating peace—is the path to equanimity. A moment of calmness gives rise to another moment of calmness. When equanimity is triggered, it’s the reason it will persist and intensify.

You can use these techniques for cultivating equanimity:

1. Balanced Emotions Towards Life

The most important thing is to approach all living things with equanimity. Your attachment to the people you love can cause imbalances.

One should endeavor to develop a nonattachment and balanced attitude toward the people and animals they love in order to create the conditions necessary for equanimity to emerge. In relationships, a certain level of attachment may be required as a worldly being, but too much attachment is harmful to both yourself and your loved ones.

You start to worry excessively about their well-being. You should attempt to set aside such excessive stress and concern for your companions’ well-being. A thought that can lead to the development of nonattachment is the idea that every entity is a product of its own past.

Humans who commit unwholesome behaviors bear the penalty while also benefiting from positive karma. Ultimately, there is absolutely nothing that you or anybody else can do to help them. You could find that you worry less about your loved ones if you think in this way.

Being equanimous does not mean being callous or unsympathetic. Its impact prevents one from clinging to what they prefer or ignoring what they detest. The state of mind that underpins this is equilibrium and acceptance of reality as it is. Empathy, this enlightened quality, allows one to let go of attachment and animosity toward beings. The teachings inform us that the antithesis of equanimity, lust, or desire leads to the deep cleaning and purifying of those who harbor such impulses.

The secret of action is to get established in equanimity, renouncing all egocentric attachments, and forgetting to worry over our successes and failures. ~ Chinmayananda Saraswati

2. Impartial Feelings Toward Inanimate Objects

Developing a balanced attitude toward inanimate objects, such as property, clothes, and the newest fad on the market, is the second method of cultivating this aspect of enlightenment. One day, clothes, for instance, will be torn and discolored. Like everything else, it’s transient, thus it will deteriorate. Moreover, you’re not the ultimate owner of it either. Nothing has an owner; everything is non-self. Viewing material possessions as ephemeral can help one achieve equilibrium and reduce attachment.

Individuals could feel pressured to purchase every new item that hits the market. After they purchase this device, a more advanced variant will not be far behind. These people purchase a new one and discard the old one. This is not an equanimity in practice.

To cultivate equanimity we practice catching ourselves when we feel attraction or aversion, before it hardens into grasping or negativity. ~ Pema Chodron

3. Steer Clear From The Negative Nellies

A third way to cultivate equanimity as an enlightenment component is to stay away from individuals who are easily agitated by others or things. These individuals are intensely possessive. They hold fast to the things and people they believe to be theirs. It might be difficult for some people to watch someone else use or enjoy their property.

Instead, select companions who don’t feel a strong bond with objects or other people. This technique for cultivating composure is just the opposite of the last one.

The absence of equanimity usually leads to dissatisfaction, rejection, irritation, frustration and disappointments. ~ Sunita Rai

4. Orienting Thoughts Toward Equilibrium

Consistently direct your thoughts toward the development of equanimity. This kind of mental tilt prevents your thoughts from straying to memories of your loved ones. It will only get more harmonic and balanced.

In daily life and in practice, maintaining composure is crucial. When faced with unpleasant or undesired objects, you either become extremely agitated or are carried away by attractive or pleasurable objects. Almost everyone experiences this irrational oscillation of opposites. They easily carry you away into extremes of either craving or aversion when you cannot maintain your equilibrium and remain unwavering.

The scriptures claim that the mind becomes irritated when it indulges in sensuous objects. As you can see, this is the way the world usually works. Many confuse mental excitation for true happiness in their pursuit of happiness. It does not allow them to feel the deeper joy that comes with serenity and peace.

Equanimity and wisdom are basically one they are not two. ~ Hui Neng

Moving Forward Living In Equanimity

The universe’s impermanence is one of the deepest truths taught by the Buddha. The teachings of the Buddha hold nothing lasts forever, and that everything changes all the time. This is part of the reason that developing equanimity is essential if one is to accept and admit the impermanence of everything and have a happy, purposeful life.

Remaining composed is essential to leading a happier life in a sea of turbulent waters. Accept the transience of life while developing emotional resilience via equanimity. After that, you won’t look back.

When force of circumstance upsets your equanimity, lose no time in recovering your self-control, and do not remain out of tune longer than you can help. Habitual recurrence to the harmony will increase your mastery of it. ~ Marcus Aurelius

Do you need help to find the equanimity in your life? Are you looking for a way to detach from things that hold you back?  Do you need someone to help you be accountable during this process? If so, please reach out to me at TerriKozlowski.com and we can create a plan for you to create inner peace through the alchemy of life.

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Understanding How To Live In Equanimity and Find Happiness
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Understanding How To Live In Equanimity and Find Happiness
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Living a life of equanimity allows you to overcome fear and find happiness. Learn how to cultivate a life of balance and harmony.
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Kozmic Soul Solutions LLC
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