Terri Kozlowski
Always Moving Forward
Always Moving Forward
Words hold power. Their meaning crystallizes perceptions, which form your ideas, motivate your conduct, and, construct your reality. Their strength stems from your emotional reactions when you read, speak, or hear them. Using the word “fire” while barbequing, at work, or in a packed theater will elicit three distinct but significant emotional and energy responses.
You know on a surface level that words can be cruel because they have power. You have been hurt by what someone has said to you. And you know that words have staying power because you carry wounds from your youth were someone said something to you, or called you a name, and it still makes you twinge now that you think about it. So, if you know this, why are you still so careless with your words? Why do you more easily spew negativity instead of using the power of words to build yourselves, and those around you, up and be a positive influence?
Negativity more easily comes from your egoic mind than something encouraging. Remember, the ego instills fear, not reassurance. The egoic mind is your worse critic. The things you say to yourself are far worse than you would ever speak to another. Why do you do this? I find it amazing that the worst suffering I endured all occurred within my mind, by the negative words I spoke to myself. So, to alter this paradigm, you need to understand how you use words and change your mindset to use them positively.
There is something about words. In expert hands, manipulated deftly, they take you prisoner. Wind themselves around your limbs like spider silk, and when you are so enthralled you cannot move, they pierce your skin, enter your blood, numb your thoughts. Inside you, they work their magic. ~ Diane Setterfield
If you remain aware of the energy you hold depending on your emotions, you can make conscious decisions that change your frequency and create the reality you wish. If you’re feeling bad about anything, you might opt to reframe the issue and lift your spirits. With a fresh viewpoint and a higher, more positive energy vibration, you have a lot greater chance of attracting good into your life rather than bitterly repeating previous mistakes.
You have been guilty of using your words as weapons against another. It begins with your siblings and grows from there, as the ego hurts others who have wounded you. Most of these wounds by others are about their bruised egos than it is about you, but your own ego won’t let it go. So, you spew back more insults and demeaning phrases in order for your ego to feel better. This helps nothing except for more negativity to be perpetuated.
As you get older, this process gets more intense as you believe that you have more at stake during negotiations or other communications. You use more sophisticated and politically correct terminology than you did when you were young, but the same negative connotations remain. By tearing down another, the ego falsely inflates itself. But you know the opposite is true, name calling or labeling others, belittles the one doing the labeling. It shows the small-mindedness and the innate fear of the name caller.
It doesn’t matter if you and everyone else in the room are thinking it. You don’t say the words. Words are weapons. They blast big bloody holes in the world. And words are bricks. Say something out loud and it starts turning solid. Say it loud enough and it becomes a wall you can’t get through. ~Richard Kadrey
As one can see, words as weapons can do significant damage. But who do you do the most destruction to, yourself, with the negative self-talk? You are your own worst critic, but even more so, is that you can be relentless in the amount of badgering you do to yourself. Here again, the ego is instilling fear by being the loudest voice in your head. If, however, you get quiet, you may hear another influence.
This is the utterance of your soul, your heart’s voice. This whisper is always present and speaking to you, but you normally don’t hear it over the screams of the ego. You must get silent and calm in order for you to hear these powerfully positive and truthful statements from your soul. This is where your self-talk needs to stem from, this accurate reality from deep within your own self.
This is the part of you that says you can do it; you just need to work a little more. Your heart believes in your innate abilities. The soul knows the genuine answers to all the questions the mind asks. But you have to get quiet to actually hear it speaking to you. For it to be the voice you hear encouraging you to move forward past the obstacle in your way because you are empowered to overcome.
We are what our thoughts have made us; so take care about what you think. Thoughts live; they travel far. ~Swami Vivekananda
Words are powerful instruments you can use to boost your personal energy and better your life, yet you’re frequently unaware of the words you use, read, and expose yourself to. The words of others may readily influence your personal frequency. Spend a few minutes with a chronic complainer who employs a variety of negative phrases, and you’ll feel your own vitality drain away. Words wield enormous power, so select them, and your friends, wisely!
Another way words are used negatively is through gossip. It’s one of Dr. Phil McGraw’s nefarious 15 from his book Life Code; New Rules for the Real World. This tactic is a tool the ego uses to build you up and tear others down, yet you do it and think its normal behavior. Just because others are doing it doesn’t mean it’s a social norm, constructive, or it’s acceptable. This behavior is more a reflection of the person doing the gossiping than about who they are trying to diminish.
You need to remind yourself you’re not privy to all the information about a situation that may be the subject of the gossip session. Therefore, you have no business judging or passing additional rumors around about others. Remember, people who gossip to you, gossip about you to others. You don’t enjoy being talked about, so don’t be unkind to others and talk about them. By not gossiping about others, you release the negativity that you spread and choose to be kind to those who aren’t present.
Live in such a way that you would not be ashamed to sell your parrot to the town gossip. ~ Will Rogers
Over time, the words said to you can grow into something wonderful because of the encouragement you received or keep you stagnant because of the deterrence you heard. Words are seeds that get planted and they continue to get planted thought out your life. These people don’t have to love ones or friends, complete strangers can plant seeds with their words.
Masaru Emoto conducted an experiment to assess the potency of spoken words. He put two cups of cooked rice in two different mason jars and secured the lids, labeled one “Thank You” and the other “You Fool.” The jars were placed in a classroom, and pupils were told to say the phrases on the labels to the jars twice a day. After 30 days, the rice in the continually insulted jar had become black and mushy. The rice in the jar that was acknowledged was as white and fluffy as the day it was prepared.
This is how powerful words can be. A complete stranger praises your work, makes a suggestion, and you pursue a new endeavor. An instructor criticizes your art and you don’t pick up a paintbrush for over twenty years. The sad thing is you allow others that much power over your life simply by the words they say. Therefore, your words have just as much power. Plant positive seeds of encouragement and pull the negative weeds you planted by apologizing for anything harsh you may have said. This is how you authentically communicate with others.
Think twice before you speak, because your words and influence will plant the seed of either success or failure in the mind of another. ~Napoleon Hill
Some of you have a propensity for repeatedly using negative words. The difficulty is that the more you hear, read, or speak a word or phrase, the stronger its hold on you. This is because the brain learns via repetition, looking for patterns and consistency to make sense of your surroundings. Repetition is the most effective way to imprint anything in your thoughts and keep it there.
In Miguel Ruiz’s book, The Four Agreements, the first agreement is to be impeccable with your words. This means that before you speak, you choose your words carefully, as they have the power to create or destroy. Of course, the goal is to be creative, encourage others, and speak love to all you come in contact with, and you can, if you are aware and conscious.
Taking a moment to think how you want to say something positively does more benefit to the listener than just blurting out what first comes into your head. Then reconfirming what you thought you heard someone speak to you shows them not only were you listening, but that you understood what they said. These are simple tools that can be used for you to choose your words carefully and lovingly so that they have a positive impact on your listener.
Speak with integrity. Say only what you mean. Avoid using the word to speak against yourself or to gossip about others. Use the power of your word in the direction of truth and love. ~ Miguel Ruiz
Put positive affirmations about yourself, your family, or your aspirations on sticky notes and place them about your house and business. Wear clothing with positive words or inscriptions on it. Imagine how much great energy you will generate for yourself if you wear optimism all day. As you continue to execute these things, you are using the power of repetition to your advantage. You have the ability to influence your reality, and using words intentionally is one of the most effective methods to shift the energy you attract into your life.
As you have seen, there is power in the words spoken to you and those you speak to others. Choose to make a conscious decision to use them in a positive way when you speak to others. Make the decision to declare love rather than hate. Elect to communicate with compassion instead of unkindness. Moving forward, remember that your words are powerful and resolve to use them for growth and liberation.
When you don’t cover up the world with words and labels, a sense of the miraculous returns to your life that was lost a long time ago when humanity, instead of using thought, became possessed by thought. ~ Eckhart Tolle
As you realize the power of your words and become conscious about your mindset, you can alter the course of your life. Do you need help to become aware of your own mindset? Do you need support in changing your self-talk to be kinder? If so, please contact me and you can put together an action plan for you to be authentically you and for you to know that you are enough.
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