Terri Kozlowski
Always Moving Forward
Always Moving Forward
Due to my angst with alcohol, I am not one to get drunk or even tipsy drinking. Even now, I don’t understand the desire to have a chemical alter your brain chemistry and become something else. But, for me, I realize that it’s about not wanting to lose control.
I have questioned others about their desire to get tipsy, why they want to do it, and how it makes them feel. Most of the replies I get are about how alcohol enables them to relax and become more self-confident. They say it allows them to be themselves.
When we consume alcohol, it alters the functions of the brain and the body. Although there seems to be more confidence, what’s being exhibited is a relaxation of inhibitions. The reduction of restraint is based on the change in our emotional state. There’s an increase in antagonism, unhappiness, or euphoria. Most people seek a euphoric state.
As the amount of liquor increases in the bloodstream, judgment becomes impaired, risk-taking increases, attention span reduces, and it negatively affects memory. Additionally, the heart rate decreases and breathing slows, causing a lack of coordination, slower motor responses, and vision problems.
Despite rarely partaking of enough alcohol to become tipsy or drunk, I think I have felt all of this while living a life of fear. I allowed my anxiety to alter the functions of my brain, and my body just like liquor does, and I become drunk on the ego.
Drunkenness is temporary suicide. ~ Bertrand Russell
The ego alters our natural emotional state of peace and love into one occupied with anguish and apprehension. It does this by having us believe that we need to be prepared for a disaster. So, we are constantly on the lookout for threats, real or fabricated by the egoic mind.
Because we’re always anxious, the cortisol levels in our bodies increases. Cortisol is known as the stress hormone, and it allows the body to deal with a real threat like a tiger chasing you. However, when we’re constantly fearful, it lingers in the body. It causes adverse reactions in our system, like inflammation, which is the underlying cause of most disease.
Cortisol decreases nonessential bodily functions during a fight-or-flight situation. It changes the way the immune system responds, slows the reproductive organs, suppresses the digestive system, as well as the growth processes. This natural alarm controls mood, motivation, and alters brain chemistry.
If, however, we continually have cortisol flowing through our system because we are anxious all the time, we have a false alarm going off. This wrong response due to fear causes unhappiness, alters motor responses, digestive disorders, affects the heart, causes sleep issues, weight problems, concentration difficulties, and memory impairment. Too much cortisol changes our emotional state, impairing our judgment, much like overindulging in alcohol. Causing us to be drunk on the ego.
Drunkenness is not romantic; it’s a form of temporary insanity. And hangovers are the body’s way of asking, ‘What were you thinking?” ~Susan J Anderson
After the trauma of being sexually abused as a child, the ego took over. First, as a survival mechanism that I needed, but the ego doesn’t like to give up control. It began to alter my perception of what was going on around me. I became angry and depressed, which is normal after trauma. Since this upset my family, I repressed these emotions. Everything that we suppress rises at some point.
My ego changed my emotional state by using shame to keep me silent. Then it lied to me about my worthiness based on my mother abandoning me if she could, wouldn’t everyone else? Feeling unworthy increased my antagonism against others, which came out as sarcasm and perfectionism.
Sarcasm is aggression masquerading as humor. It’s a way of putting down another without fear of repercussion. It’s a refined form of bullying. Sarcasm gives us a false sense of confidence as we risk nothing since we are only using words.
Perfectionism is how the ego impairs our judgment. It blames others instead of taking responsibility for the choices we’ve made. Perfectionists are complainers, and they point out all the things that are not ideal, even if no one else noticed.
By allowing the egoic mind to be in control, I became drunk, altered by my fear. My attention was diverted to those areas that attempted to keep my ego in control. It changed memories to sustain my anxious state. Being drunk on the ego powered my fearful existence.
Drunkenness is nothing but voluntary madness. ~ Seneca
I was drunk on the ego for over ten years before I tried to get sober. I was aware of where my issues stemmed from, but it took time to overcome my limiting beliefs. During this time, my body suffered under the ego’s power.
Since I wasn’t in a fight-or-flight situation but always fearful, my cortisol levels stayed elevated. This constant anxious state caused me to have a series of digestive issues from indigestion, peptic ulcers, and accumulating into appendicitis. After the emergency appendectomy, I contracted peritonitis. It caused neuropathy in my extremities and almost killed me.
I also suffered from uterine fibroid and breast cyst as my reproductive systems were affected. There was a heart arrhythmia that was dealt with as my consumption of caffeine was outrageous. I also suffered from migraines.
My physical self suffered through a series of dis-ease due to the stupor caused by my egoic mind keeping me in a heightened, fearful state. The body tried to speak to my true authentic self with these outward manifestations through all the same systems that alcohol affects. I finally heard the whimpers of my soul, asking for help.
Over time I started to treat my body better. I walked, eliminated sugar, and most of my caffeine consumption. I started taking yoga and learned to meditate. Self-care became a regular activity.
What does drunkenness accomplish? It discloses secrets; it ratifies hopes and urges even the unarmed to battle. ~ Horace
Despite knowing that the egoic mind lies to us, we can’t get rid of it. It’s here with us on our journey, so how do we deal with it in a way that is helpful and not damaging to us.
We need to acknowledge it. The ego is a part of ourselves that wants to protect us, so it’s primary purpose is to identify those things that could be harmful. So, recognize the guidance it’s giving. You don’t have to believe that what the ego is pointing out is a threat; you just have to see what it’s showing you.
Since the ego works out of self-interest, it resists feedback as it always thinks its right. So, don’t try to argue or reason with it. That’s what the egoic mind does. It works to engage you in a conversation that most likely it will win as it knows how to persuade you as it is you.
Once it’s recognized and you dismiss it as unharmful, you can move forward. How do you know it’s not damaging? You can discern a real threat to your well-being. Sobriety is the ability to have confidence in yourself to determine the situation is safe. It’s having faith in your abilities because you’ve worked hard to get here, and you’re thriving despite the ego’s false perception. This is how you overcome being drunk by the ego.
I had taken two finger bowls of champagne, and the scene had changed before my eyes into something significant, elemental, and profound. ~ F. Scott Fitzgerald
The ego’s dogma stays in our heads for a long time. It tells us that what’s outside of us is what matters. But, the egoic mind cannot sustain us. Despite the ego’s frailty, it fights hard to maintain control. It wants to win, no matter what the cost, even to itself.
Awareness of the ego is the first step in overcoming it. Being conscious of the ploys it uses helps us maintain our sobriety.
Being responsible for your mindset is another area that mindfulness plays a role. Your authentic self knows how to direct its behavior to manage impulses, take actions towards goals, and is resilient in the face of setbacks. It realizes that it can change its mind or emotions and move in a new direction at will. It reframes the story by examining the events to find the lesson it has learned.
The authentic self is a humble being. It realizes our worthiness and accepts itself as it is, including its flaws. Therefore, it’s willing to empathize with others and accept them as well. This acceptance opens us up to compassion and allows us to pursue a higher purpose outside ourselves.
Connecting to Spirit is our ultimate destiny while on Earth. The higher purpose is what makes our lives exciting and passionate. To maintain sobriety from the ego, we need to get quiet. Removing the noise of the egoic mind allows you to hear the whisper of the heart and the ability to follow your dreams.
I don’t need alcohol to see the world in its depths; I carry the sun in me. ~ Lamine Pearlheart
Although I know how the ego alters our perception, being drunk on the ego isn’t something I ever want to experience again. I don’t like my emotions being controlled by the egoic mind. I didn’t like feeling angry and depressed because I was kept in a constant state of fear. My body suffered because of the stupor I was in due to trauma and not realizing I could change how I lived. That’s the goal of the ego; to maintain a life of fear.
To overcome the ego and sustain sobriety, we need to be aware of its disguises and the tools it uses to control us. We need to empower our selves to be responsible for our lives and the choices we make. Maintain our connection to others and the Divine so that our lives have meaning. We must stay vigilant as the ego is always with us. Mostly pointing out false dangers.
One reason why I don’t drink is because I wish to know when I am having a good time. ~ Nancy Astor
As you become conscious of your life and aware of how your ego works, you can overcome your drunken state. If you would like to receive more informative articles right into your mailbox, fill this out.
Do you need support to gain sobriety from the egoic mind? Do you want a strategy to help you overcome the ego’s limiting beliefs and live authentically? If so, please, contact me, and we can put together an action plan for you to create the life you desire.
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