Terri Kozlowski
Always Moving Forward
Always Moving Forward
As authentic beings, we are awakening to the fullness of the life we live and the natural life around us. When we become conscious of the present moment, we become aware that we are an observer of the life we lead. As a viewer, we are not attached to the outcomes of events as we are aware that the Universe is working things out so that we evolve more fully into ourselves.
This awareness allows us to be happy in the present moment permanently. Here is a guide to help you become more aware, more conscious, as well as ways in which awareness can be used to affect others and the world around us.
Each day we get bombarded with all kinds of thoughts and ideas from our ego that are meaningless to our lives. These notions and feelings keep us from being aware of what our current situation actually is. Awareness is the discernment of the current state; it is fully conscious of the present moment. Here are eight ways to help you become more present and aware.
Awareness is the birthplace of possibility. Everything you want to do, everything you want to be, starts with being mindful. To be a successful visionary, you must be as aware as possible. At every moment, many paths lead forward. Mindfulness helps to tell you the right one to take. So what is awareness?
Awareness is about transparent, honest, uncensored feedback. Some of this feedback comes from other trustworthy people, some from the general environment you find yourself in, and, more importantly, from inside you. Although all three domains are linked inseparably, self-awareness is the most important.
Your mindfulness affects everyone around you and has a positive impact on your well-being. Those whom you lead and serve depend on your perception of the situation. You must reach inside for the right response. You alone can raise the group’s awareness from lower needs to higher needs. To do that, you must first fulfill each need in yourself. Here are five ways to become more aware of the different aspects of your life so you can create your dream.
Fully being in the present moment allows us to see the synchronicities in our lives and respond to them in a way that keeps us going in the right direction. Synchronicity is a concept, first introduced by psychologist Carl Jung, which states that events are “meaningful coincidences” if they occur with no underlying connection. However, they seem to be meaningfully associated. Thinking about your college roommate, and she calls you a few minutes later, is an example of synchronicity. We’ve all experienced these types of scenarios, but we rarely realize how important they can be in our lives.
By living a conscious lifestyle, we can stitch these moments together to see that the Universe is assisting us in some way. It gives us these bits of information to show us we’re on the right path or that we need to alter our mindset. Only when we’re aware and fully present, we can make our own luck, make our dreams a reality, and fulfill our destiny. Here is how to understand synchronicity and its effect on your life is. It’s one way the Universe communicates with your soul.
I have spent most of my life with the incessant chattering of negativity from my ego inside my head. It is this voice that tells us we are unworthy, which is a lie. The egoic mind that speaks is the one that tries to take away our internal Divine peace. When I started taking yoga, it helped my meditation practice, and I could turn off the babbling of my ego.
When I wrote in my journal about this, I realized how much peace I felt day in and day out despite the regular daily tasks and annoyances that occur. I also realized that peace had always been there. But I just was not focused on it. I was choosing to focus on the stress and anxiety I was creating. We all have peace inside us, and here are the seven methods that I could use to bring peace into my life every day.
Prayer is a conduit for communicating with Source, Spirit, the Universe, whatever term you use. Studies have shown that prayer contributes to our well-being. When we get quiet, after meditation, and we can converse with Source. It’s a two-way communication. We can ask questions, make our desires known, be grateful, and we can get answers if we sit quietly and wait for a reply. Using prayer is a powerful internal pivot away from the ego and towards listening to our hearts, the soul’s voice.
Pivoting is a shift in our approach to a situation. By embracing the power of prayer, we can pivot towards different ways of perceiving the situations we find ourselves. Prayer enhances two-way communication so that we can find the best answer for ourselves. The way to handle the state we are in is to pray. By doing so, we have sought the internal solution from our soul, which is always connected to Source.
According to a Pew Report, nearly 80% of Americans believe in miracles. These are high numbers and are surprising in this age of science. But, if you look around at nature, there are miracles everywhere. Just because we understand how flowers bloom doesn’t mean it’s not wonderous. Understanding the science behind an event like a caterpillar becoming a butterfly doesn’t make it less amazing.
The real wonder, I think, is the ability for human beings to move past the egoic mind of our limiting beliefs. The Course in Miracles says that a shift from fear to love is a miracle. Being a miracle-minded person means that our mind is open to possibilities that our brain doesn’t understand.
That also sounds like what happens when we fall in love, doesn’t it? Love is something our intellect cannot understand. Science says that it’s a chemical reaction in the brain that moves us from lust to attraction. Finally, to attachment, each stage is governed by different chemicals. But despite science being able to explain what’s happening in the brain, love is not rational and cannot be explained. It’s a mystery, and it comes from Spirit.
We’re born unafraid. When we come into this world, we know we’re beings of light. We understand that we’re worthy. And we recognize that we’re here to love and be loved. We come knowing what we’re supposed to do. Aware of our full potential. Confident and ready to fulfill our purpose. Moving forward into the unknown without fear; fear is a learned behavior. This unknown shapes us. The family we are born into is the first unknown we encounter.
Born into this Earth school, our parents give us a name, and mine is Terri Marie. They give us a religious belief. We’re born with an ethnicity into a family that has its own set of baggage that it inadvertently passes on to us. This new family tells us who we are, not allowing us to develop as Spirit intended – as a human being of love.
Our life’s journey is to grow and be our authentic selves. Children learn to fear, to think negatively, and to close off their instinctive selves based on their experiences, both good and bad. This process is how we forget who we really are. And our ultimate destiny is to return to our authentic selves and reconnect with the Divine.
Part of becoming mindful and aware is getting quiet. In silence, you discover your true, authentic self. But getting your mind to stop its egoic, fearful thinking can be a complicated process.
Many studies are showing the benefits of mediation for stress relief and brain health. So when Deepak Chopra and Oprah Winfrey started the 21-Day Meditation series in 2013, I took part. I felt that through this teaching, I could learn to meditate daily. Well, I meditated daily after this, but I wouldn’t say the constant chatter in my egoic mind subsided when I did.
Our friends are the vital personal connections we have with others that help make our lives complete. These positive relationships have a significant impact on how we approach obstacles in our lives. If we have support from others, we are less fearful of the challenge before us and have more self-confidence.
When we feel others love and support us, our stress levels decrease, and we can cope with the twists and turns life brings. Just having a friend present with us can lower our stress because we feel we can share the load with them.
Since these connections are so crucial, why is it we neglect our friends? Or feel overwhelmed in maintaining these connections, especially when someone is going through a rough patch? When we feel comfortable, why do we lash out at our supporters? Do they get to see the best of us most of the time, or are we vomiting our negativity at them? Are we a good friend to them?
We all want friends in our lives; therefore, we all should strive to improve our relationship with those who love and support us. We need to become better friends with those around us.
When another is criticizing us, how do we react? Most of us automatically get defensive because we allow our egoic minds to take over our actions. Others of us may stay quiet and take it because we feel we deserve the adverse treatment. Do we even consider how we should respond versus reacting so we have an outcome we’d prefer?
I believe there is a difference between reacting and responding. A reaction is an immediate and most often automatic reply to a situation, an impulse. Reacting can be instinctive, but also in resistance to the circumstances. We base most reactions on our emotional state. Usually, when we react, it comes from fear, and we have no filters in our processing of the conditions.
In contrast, a response is a thought-out answer where options were considered. We are purposeful in how we reply to the conditions and are using emotional intelligence in our solutions. When we respond, we can consciously reply from a place of love and make the situation better.
When we pause before we reply to the circumstances, we allow our souls to whisper to us the best way to respond. Only when we respond from a place of love, can we be inclusive, make authentic connections, and allow peace to come into the outcomes.
We all have patterns of behaviors that are passed down through the generations. Some are good, and some conduct is harmful and causes ongoing complications. For children of childhood trauma, like myself, if we look with a compassionate eye at our abuser, we most likely find they, too, were mistreated in their past.
Wounded people hurt others, but it’s not a justifiable reason for the pattern to continue. Each of us injured people needs to learn to take responsibility for our behaviors, especially the adverse reactions we have that may harm others. Awareness is the key. We can be the generation that stops passing them on to our children. We can heal so they don’t have to.
Interestingly, many of us are very vocal about not wanting to be like our parents. My husband is proud to say that he is his anti-father. He consciously worked to be the opposite of who his father was to him. But without realizing it, many of us are still mirroring the behaviors we learned through our domestication process.
So those thoughts, perspectives, or beliefs which are emotionally or culturally passed down through our families are generational patterns. It’s the lens we see the world through, shaped by our families. Unless we know they exist, they continue to leave scars on each generation.
Everyone makes judgments every day. We make snap decisions based on the news we watch or what our friends post on social media. Quickly, we determine if something is good, irrelevant, or bad. We do this about people, events, and emotions. At that moment, we form an opinion about how we will reply to whatever our circumstances are. Most aren’t aware they are doing it.
The brain is wired to make these judgment calls as part of its survival mechanisms. Our eyes scan our surroundings to determine threat levels and search for ways to counteract them if they arise. This level of egoic fear made sense in our early evolution to keep us alive. But now, most of us aren’t dealing with the elements or wild creatures, and our fear is causing more harm.
When our ego is trying to determine if something is safe, it now looks at our experiences, how we compare to others, and our hurt feelings. And suppose it decides that those around us differ from ourselves. In that case, it wants to instill fear in us because these differences are unknown.
When we look at this logically, we can see how irrational the egoic mind is. But this process causes us to fear those things that are unfamiliar to us. What we fear is unsafe; therefore, we evade, destroy, and undermine it. And thus, we have the roots to hate that lead to prejudice, chauvinism, and intolerance.
I write every week, mostly when I am alone because inevitably, I get interrupted. It could be a phone notification, the puppy in my lap wanting to get a drink, or noise from outside my office window. The distraction disrupts my train of thought, and sometimes I’m unable to get back on track.
When I was researching this article, it surprised me to learn that our brains are wired for distraction. Why? Because if something else is more enjoyable, interesting, or threatening, then our brains will respond, and we get a dopamine reward. During our evolution, this disturbance was an excellent tactic to notice the bear approaching or investigating a potential food source.
In today’s society, our ability to notice something for our survival isn’t essential. Now interruptions pull us away from being productive or concentrating on a task we are trying to accomplish.
Social media, emails popping into our inbox, or a cell phone notification, are more likely to make us feel good quickly than finishing a chore on our to-do list. But we all still have tasks we must complete, despite the distractions that interrupt us. Good concentration requires discipline, and it’s a skill we can learn.
So, how can we quickly get back on track and accomplish the goals we have? Awareness of what’s causing us to get distracted helps us set up the right conditions to be productive and focused.
Our lives only happen in the present moment. We can’t change the past, and the actions we take are happening now, not in the future. But many of us aren’t fully aware of what we are currently doing and, therefore, aren’t living an empowered life.
Being present doesn’t mean we don’t think or plan for the future. Being aware doesn’t mean we are on our phones scrolling through social media. It means that we are engaging in life. We are authentically connecting with others. And we notice the breeze, our child’s joy, or the homeless person smiling at us. We are consciously taking part in our lives using all of our senses.
What is persistence, and why is it important to never give up? Tenacity or determination is really about our ability to maintain and pursue our goals, dreams and live our lives authentically. And for many people, the idea of whatever that simple dream is, whatever that goal is, a lot of us believe that’s unattainable. Part of the reason is the negative voices that are around us. So, for example, if you have somebody who is unsupportive, and your dream is to do something that they don’t feel you’re going to be able to do.
For example, I wanted to be a speech pathologist when I was getting ready to go to college. And my dad did not want me to go into that field. He talked me out of going to school to do that because his concern was, I’d make no money at it. At the time, the speech pathologist was making about $30,000. So this timing would have been in the mid-80s. And they all worked in hospitals.
My dad wasn’t aware that, as baby boomers age, there were going to be many speech pathologists needed for stroke victims. And that’s the kind of work that I would have wanted to do. And those types of people ended up making $70,000 a year doing in the early 2000s, and not in hospital settings, actually private practices.
For many years, I felt lost and confused. I was in a good partnership with my husband. The kids were grown and living their own lives. All was well, but I felt like something was missing. I had a job I enjoyed, but I had nothing I was really passionate about doing.
When we moved into our current home, I started exploring. I went to painting classes, yoga classes and joined a book club. I enjoyed the discovery process I was going through despite not feeling clear about my life’s direction.
See, you can be happy without clearly knowing what’s next in your lives. Remember, our life is about the journey, not the destination. So the uncertainty I felt wasn’t coming from a place of fear. Instead, the confusion I was in seems to come from a place of “I’ve done these things (motherhood, climbed the corporate ladder, biker gang leader), now what?”
I wasn’t comparing myself to others. Instead, I was seeking the next level in my life.
The direction I was seeking was an internal growth spurt that caused me to sit down and write my book Raven Transcending Fear. And the new journey I undertook was nothing I could have imagined. But, of course, when you allow yourself to be and enjoy life, it’s an adventure, even when you feel confused. But how did I go from seeking a direction to actually finding one?
How you feel affects how you perceive. If you’re content, life flows. But if you’re upset, then you’ll see more negativity. Why? Because your perception of the world is a projection from your egoic mind. So, this means that you have control over what you perceive simply by changing your mind about what you see.
Right now, you’re projecting the contents of your egoic mind out into the world. These projections result in the thoughts and experiences you have. Projection is neither good nor bad. It’s how you process the world around you based on your beliefs, mindset, emotions, and experiences.
They come up as projections when you repress those things about you you don’t like or want to deal with, like a negative experience. For example, I don’t like people who micromanage. And yet, I do what I don’t want to others. So, when I see controlling people others, what I am seeing is a part of myself. I am projecting onto others those things in myself and or my egoic mind.
See, everything and everyone is connected because it’s conceived in your mind. But for you to overcome what the egoic mind sees, you must look through the eyes of the soul.
Did you know your brain is hard-wired to feel empathy for others? That’s why you wince when you see someone experiencing pain because you anticipate how you would feel. But this is not the type of pain I want you to open your eyes to see. Instead, I want you to see the silent emotional anguish of those around you. Why? Because when you can see the hurt of others, it empowers you to make an authentic connection to help them overcome their suffering.
So the pain I’m referring to is the suffering caused by egoic thoughts. For example, when the ego brings up past events or plays out unlikely scenarios about the future–those ideas cause anxiety and stress. Still, they are all caused by the internal conversations within the mind. So, the truth is, the thoughts you have cause your torment.
This realization was a huge Ah-Ha moment for me. Why? Because when I understood I was the cause of my suffering, I could change my behavior and stop the anguish. But when others are in torment, they can’t see this universal truth. That’s where you come in. I want you to open your eyes and look for those who are trying to hide their pain behind masks and armor of a forced smile and the “I’m fine” comment. One simple act of kindness from you can alter a person’s perspective and give them hope.
Hope is a magical word. It brings wonder into the mundane and allows for endless possibilities. The definition of the word is to expect a desired outcome to occur. You see hope in the wishfulness of a child, the excitement of a recent graduate getting ready to take on the world, and the generosity of others during the holiday season. Hope is a way for humans to cope with adverse situations.
Everyone has lost hope at some point in their life, especially people who weren’t appropriately supported as a child or had childhood trauma like myself. For example, feeling unloved because of the loss of someone important to you can start you down a hopeless path. Likewise, abuse of any kind can make you feel unworthy and that your life is out of control, so you feel despair. Or maybe life has gotten overwhelming, and you don’t feel you can handle any more responsibility, as burnout has set in.
So, when you’ve lost hope, it’s challenging to locate it again. But when you don’t have a sense of optimism, your life can become dark, and fear quickly takes over. Therefore, recovering your hope is essential to regain the balance of life. Everyone wants to believe that their future is bright, and hope believes it’s possible despite the circumstances.
It’s time to reflect on the past year and envision what could be in the new year. What were fond memories created this year that you’ll reminisce about in the future? Were there lessons you learned which you will take with you as you move forward? Finally, ponder the goals achieved and why some objectives weren’t realized as the year closes.
What dreams do you have as you look forward to the new year? What are you looking forward to doing in 2022? I don’t make New Year’s resolutions. I instead do a Happiness Project. Therefore, each month I pick an area I want to improve, and for 30 days, that is where my focus is. So, for example, my theme is a clean slate next month. Each week, I will concentrate on one area like completion and how to bring things to a close. Then, the next week, I’ll work on clearing my mind of old beliefs that no longer serve me. After that, I’ll look at the new beginnings, and finally, the last week of the month, I’ll see about repacking my baggage in a way to lighten my load in the new year.
Other month’s themes include loving myself, being determined to be my authentic self, balance, and cultivating growth. Each month, I purposely create the life I want to live by doing this process. I am currently envisioning how I want my life to be as I move from month to month in the new year.
Do you believe in miracles? How about everyday magic? What do you consider magical? I think magic is the belief in possibilities. You know, the chance something can occur. Many people call it luck, fate, providence, coincidence, kismet, destiny, or fortune. Have you considered the idea that magic is the foresight or inner wisdom coming to the surface of your life? Hmmm.
Do you remember the sense of awe you had when you were a child? The wonder at how an ant could carry something three times its size. Or seeing the ocean for the first time and realizing how extraordinary it was. It’s heartbreaking that as you age, you lose the sense of awe and no longer see the magic life offers every day.
How often do you daydream? Do you admonish yourself for this so-called time-wasting activity? You really shouldn’t because your ability to imagine permeates your being. Why? Because it influences all you accomplish and produce.
There are many mysteries in life. Where is your consciousness? How did life begin on Earth? What’s happening in the Bermuda triangle? Can you predict the future? There are many hypotheses about how the Universe began, the evolution of humanity, and dark matter, but they are only theories. Just because the scientific world has come up with ideas that could explain a mystery doesn’t mean it’s true. That’s why they are called the Theory of General Relativity and the Big Bang Theory.
When you have a sudden insight into something, it’s called a revelation, epiphany, or aha-moment. Whether it solves a problem, is a discovery, or an enlightening realization, these moments can be a defining point in your life. They can arise from an awe-inspiring sight or a personal time of reflection.
Do you consider yourself to be a flexible person? Are you able to go with the flow as situations change? To not react negatively to a modification in plans or the need to pivot. As a recovering control freak, I understand the desire to know what’s going to happen next. But when the Universe wants you to have an experience, your struggle against what is, causes you angst. Instead, when you accept the circumstances as synchronistic, you realign yourself with Universal flow and balance returns.
Achieving harmony requires you to evaluate how you incorporate every element of your life. This means everything: your work, your relationships, your creative outlets, etc. What does it mean to have harmony and balance? How do those two differ from one another? Harmony and balance are two aspects of the same thing. Both deal with how you relate to yourself and the things that are most important to you.
Nurturing is about encouraging growth and development. You can see this in many family dynamics, school, and college settings. But do you nurture yourself? Are you inspiring yourself to step outside your comfort zone? What about taking that class you keep looking at online? The ability to nurture one’s self comes down to being aware of your dreams and learning to fulfill the desires you have from an emotional, mental, physical, and spiritual level.
Living a balanced lifestyle comes by being consistent with healthy habits, positive routines, and regular reviews of your life. How you structure your self-care, maintain your health, and are harmonious with others is based on your ability to review your life patterns consistently.
30. Actually, It Helps To Learn How To Relax Through Amusement
How do you like to unwind, chill out, and truly relax? In your always-on digital environment, unwinding is becoming more difficult. Even in the best of circumstances, finding time to kick back and be amused can be challenging. Even quick, delightful activities like watching a favorite show or reading a magazine can feel difficult to fit in. Giving yourself the permission to unwind and have fun while trying to make substantial life changes can feel especially difficult.
31. Resting Is A Simple Tool In Living A Relaxed Life
Everyone’s idea of rest may be different. Making time for leisurely pursuits like watching the sunrise can make you feel relaxed and reduce stress. You give your mind and emotions a break from stimuli when you rest. While you can relax your body while you sleep, resting encompasses your entire being. When you are awake, it enables you to take a break and let your mind drift off.
32. It’s Your Responsibility To Recognize Wellness is Vital to Relaxation
A holistic style of living, wellness places importance on a person’s physical, emotional, and spiritual well-being. Being healthy and disease-free is the condition of wellness. Because of the fast-paced culture, many people struggle with stress, anxiety, depression, and other health problems. The pursuit of a wellness lifestyle, however, can enhance your quality of life, enhance your health, and help you realize your full potential.
33. It’s Powerful To Let Yourself Rejuvenate As Part Of Self-Care
When was the last time you experienced joy? Consider it for a moment and attempt to remember the event. Don’t you believe it’s time to recover that same flow of positive vibes? To rejuvenate you need to adopt the proper mindset and develop useful habits to jump-start living the life of your dreams. I describe rejuvenation as a practice that both delays and reverses the aging process. The result of renewal is a younger physique.
34. Creating and Using Fond Memories for Less Stress and More Happiness
You accumulate memories as you age. Some of those are magnificent gems that you return to and visit, like the birth of a child. While others bother you like a leaky faucet in the middle of the night. Plunk. Plunk. Plunk. It’s eerily annoying and difficult to turn it off at three in the morning. How then do we repair the faucet? You can train the mind to cherish only a select few lovely thoughts while banishing others to a forgotten dungeon if you practice the art of selection.
35. How To Overcome Traumatic Memories To Live A Happy Life
Your identity and how you interact with the world are shaped by your memories. Many of the memories you’ve accumulated are beneficial or enjoyable, but some memories might be upsetting. War, disasters, abuse, and sexual assault memories can have a negative impact on the mind, resulting in serious emotional and psychological trauma. You can experience anxiety, stress, irritability, and depression because of this.
36. Here’s How To Deal With The Memories of Loved Ones
Like all other elements of death, remembering a loved one is a matter of preference. It is a means to honor a life that was lived, shared, and that affected other people. The most crucial thing to keep in mind when remembering a loved one is that authentic connection; a funny anecdote or that unforgettable experience. Sometimes it doesn’t involve a material object. Everybody remembers their loved ones in their own unique ways.
37. How To Be Grateful for All The Knowledge You Gained Through Life
There are many obstacles in life. Perhaps a relationship ends, you quit your job, or a health issue prevents you from engaging in a beloved hobby. When you pay attention to them, these challenges can not only test you but also teach you important life lessons to add to your knowledge base. But regrettably, many have a negative opinion of them and grow angry and bitter.
38. How To Make Memories You Love To Remember Later In Life
Time flies. That isn’t false, is it? But it moves so quickly and you don’t realize it. Instead, it feels as though you blink and years have passed. You’re about to embark on your adult journey after graduating from high school. Next, your own child will embark on the same path. A second blink will transform you into a great-grandmother who is suddenly recalling memories spanning many decades.
39. Stability Isn’t To Overcome Insecurity It’s Being Comfortable with It
The only thing you know for certain is that life will be full of uncertainty. Life stability is achieved by dealing with change wisely and effectively, rather than by preventing it.
Life transitions are the unavoidable changes that occur throughout your life, ranging from milestones like marriage and parenting to unforeseen events, such as job loss or relocation. They include both beneficial and unpleasant shifts, requiring you to adapt and find stability in the face of uncertainty.
Moving Forward Awakening Your Awareness
Now that you understand what awakening your awareness entails, you can easily choose to be open to all the Universe has for you. You can now inspire yourself to develop your life and expand your mind as you mature. As your authentic self journeys through this world, successful living is easier to achieve, and you can make genuine connections with others.
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