Terri Kozlowski
Always Moving Forward
Always Moving Forward
According to the Oxford Dictionary, humility means a modest or low view of one’s importance; humbleness. What is significant about this definition is that it’s referring to how you view yourself in rank or position with others. It’s the opposite of comparison because you understand and believe that everyone is equal to you.
Being humble is the realization that you aren’t more significant or better than others. It’s the awareness that you are equally important to everyone else. It means you have personal boundaries in place, so no one takes advantage of you, but you acknowledge the differences that make each person authentic. And it’s the knowledge that every person is equally valuable and that your value is neither greater nor lesser than anyone else’s.
So humility is a favorable strength. And people describe humble individuals as kind, modest, and positive. Several studies have supported a significant link between humility and confidence. Studies have also proposed that the current six basic leadership qualities—drive, leadership motivation, self-confidence, honesty and integrity, cognitive capacity, and business knowledge—should be expanded to include humility.
Being nice and generous, as well as showing consideration and sincerity to others, including strangers, are all aspects of humility. Being humble is a valuable quality that is likely influenced by many facets of your personality.
The seeker after truth should be humbler than the dust. The world crushes the dust under its feet, but the seeker after truth should so humble himself that even the dust could crush him. Only then, and not till then, will he have a glimpse of the truth. ~ Mahatma Gandhi
Humility does not imply a lack of confidence or low self-esteem. Humbleness is one trait that defines both who you are and how others perceive you. Society continuously attempts to determine your value by persuading you that your life will be more worthwhile if you earn more money, get married, have kids, or do many other things.
The essence of humility is profound acceptance. It’s about embracing your humanity, which entails embracing both your strengths and weaknesses. When you misinterpret your worth and disregard your contributions, you have low self-esteem. Arrogance is the false belief that you are more valuable than other people and the exaggeration of your accomplishments to support this belief.
Both low self-esteem and arrogance are a refusal to acknowledge or accept the whole of who you are and your need for help. But humility realizes that you are already whole and worthy, just as you are. There is nothing you can do to increase or decrease your value. Everything you ever accomplish is done with help from the visible and invisible forces all around you.
No human being accomplishes anything alone. So many people help you and you help others. Seeing and embracing all of that and underestimating none of it is what humility is. Being arrogant or downplaying your abilities and assets does not make you humble. It causes you to have low self-esteem and an incorrect perception that you are inferior to others.
If we remain humble and grounded in nature’s wisdom, our mind will guide us safely through the confines of unawareness and the blindness of ignorance. ~ Erik Pevernagie
It’s arrogance which means having an exaggerated sense of one’s own importance or abilities. Hubris has affected everyone. Examples include boasting about your successes, believing you matter more because of whatever you’ve accomplished, being a know-it-all, or condemning others who don’t meet your standards.
But confidence isn’t at all what arrogance is about. If you truly felt good about yourself, you wouldn’t need to brag about your achievements or appear you did everything on your own. Since you’ve internalized your self-worth, true confidence breeds humility.
Hubris is the refusal to accept the aspects of yourself that you don’t like. It’s not accepting the idea that you are occasionally mistaken or flawed. Ironically, because you don’t feel you are enough, significant degrees of shame and self-doubt frequently accompany arrogance. As a result, your egoic mind feels the need to exaggerate your successes and beat yourself up.
Studies reveal that people with excessive arrogance and pride frequently experience shame. They don’t have an innate sense of value. Instead, their self-worth comes from their accomplishments. As a result, hubristic self-worth is never absolute. The external source of worth is gone when something bad happens and the shame returns.
On the other hand, humility is about having an internalized and unwavering sense of value, since this sense of worth is constant despite any shifting external circumstances in your life. Nothing that you make, accomplish, or lose can raise or lower your sense of worth, thus you don’t need to brag about it.
Pride makes us artificial, and humility makes us real. ~ Thomas Merton
In a time when many complain about the world’s increasing selfishness and the “I” mentality, perhaps you should work to cultivate a more modest outlook. Here are nine traits of humble people to help you recognize what being humble looks like.
Emotional intelligence is a function of situational awareness since it involves being aware of oneself, the group, each member’s activities, and the social dynamics present. As a result, situationally aware individuals direct their attention outward to learn more about the situation.
According to studies, humble people are more likely to assist friends than their arrogant counterparts. They make and sustain more authentic connections. Companies with humble people in leadership positions had more engaged workforces and lower employee turnover.
When faced with tough choices, humble people respect the moral and ethical guidelines that govern the choice and base their decision-making criteria on a feeling of shared purpose rather than self-interest because they prioritize the needs of others before their own.
Humble people are aware of their value. They consequently don’t feel the need to display their knowledge to others to impress them. Instead, humble people understand that knowledge is meaningless until others know how much you care for them. The fundamental secret to success is humility. Successful people occasionally get off track. They frequently enjoy and overindulge in success’s fruits. Humility stops this arrogance and self-indulgence trap. Humble people share the riches and the credit while keeping focused and driven to keep on the path to success.
There is nothing more unpleasant than having a conversation with someone eager to speak. When you observe their thinking processes, you can tell they are not paying attention and are instead preparing to talk. Why? They won’t listen to you because they think what they have to say is more important. They are prioritizing their interests.
But humble people listen to others before they summarize a discussion. Furthermore, humble people avoid talking over or dominating other people in a conversation. They are curious and keen to comprehend others and are always looking to improve their communication skills.
Humble individuals seek information because they are lifelong students who are aware that they are not the source of all knowledge. They learn from other people’s experiences and want more learning opportunities.
Although active listening is crucial, humble people aren’t hesitant to voice their thoughts since they don’t dread being proven wrong. They gather the strength to face adversity as they gratefully expect to express themselves honestly.
Humble people don’t think that someone else’s victory automatically translates into their loss. Instead, they understand that there are lots of opportunities available and that getting them only requires awareness, cooperation, and communication. They believe their life is abundant and full.
Since they know that constructive criticism is a means of progress, humble people are not only open to receiving it but also actively seeking it out. They also take ownership by standing up and owning their part of the circumstances. They don’t seek to blame others or make excuses for their actions.
Humility will open more doors than arrogance ever will. ~ Zig Ziglar
Because you’re frequently encouraged to believe that you must look out for yourself because no one else would, humility can appear out of date. According to this point of view, being aggressive is necessary to get what you need in life, which, along with pride, may be the exact opposite of humility.
Being able to stand up for yourself and others while gently expressing your point of view is more suitable. Since assertiveness acknowledges that everyone has an equal right to be heard and allows everyone to express themselves, it’s unquestionably compatible with humility. In fact, one might make the case that humility is not only necessary for the development of assertiveness but also perfectly compatible with it.
Humility is one of the hardest qualities for many to cultivate since it requires admitting that you are not always right and that you do not have all the answers. Additionally, it causes self-acceptance, which many find difficult.
When you are at the bottom—new in your position for example—it’s quite simple to be humble. However, as you age, it becomes more probable that people will come to you for guidance and you will come to believe that you can be of assistance. If you’re not careful, you might assume you’re more valuable, which is precisely the time when you need humility the most.
I am sufficiently proud of my knowing something to be modest about my not knowing all. ~ Vladimir Nabokov
Here are five activities you can try to live a more humble life.
Being humble is valuing other people and allowing them to be heard. A highly effective method to comprehend this is to take the time to listen to others, elicit their thoughts and values, and allow them to express themselves. Keep in mind that you are simply listening and responding to them as a fellow human being. You aren’t attempting to solve their issues or provide solutions.
Accepting what is rather than passing judgment and making comments about it is a crucial component of mindfulness. As well as staying grounded. Accepting all of your flaws rather than allowing the ego to disparage you for them is a crucial component of humility. That doesn’t mean you shouldn’t try to improve, just do it constructively rather than criticizing yourself for your flaws.
In other words, stop and count your blessings. It’s simple to fall into a vicious cycle of constantly seeking more. A more humble and upbeat attitude can be developed by taking some time to pause and consider what you have to be thankful for.
There is a type of pride that stems from being able to handle difficulties on your own. Therefore, humility is the ability to recognize when you need help and how to ask for it.
Although leaders may find this to be of particular importance, everyone can benefit from knowing what others think of them. Spend some time asking for comments from your trusted tribe and make it evident that you value their input. Be open to hearing the suggestions, then express gratitude.
Perfection is impossible without humility. Why should I strive for perfection if I am already good enough? ~ Leo Tolstoy
Even the most menial activities are beautiful when done by caring and humble hands. You see the love emanating from the person who is humbly doing the work which inspires others. Their joy shines through their work as they gracefully live a flourishing life.
Love and wisdom come from a humble place within your heart. You cannot love from an arrogant place. Wisdom is a soulful trait that an arrogant person cannot tap into because hubris doesn’t allow for self-love and acceptance. Only through humility can one lead a graceful life.
Humility, that low, sweet root, from which all heavenly virtues shoot. ~ Thomas Moore
Do you need help to alter your mindset? Are you looking for support in learning to actively listen to others? Do you want a strategy to help you create an extraordinary life? If so, please get in touch with me, and we can put together an action plan for you to become humble and live a graceful life.
To discover how I learned to become more humble, you can do so by reading my book, Raven Transcending Fear, available on Amazon or you can go to RavenTranscendingFear.com for more information.
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